*una poema de Christian Andres

Change is constant. The constant change I undergo is deeply ingrained within my life. Not that I am unstable but rather I am continually growing and experiencing new things. This can be confusing to some people who try to understand; yet I don't think many people will ever fully understand me. Maintaining energy for life and pushing forward with hope and faith is what I live for. There is a lot to worry about and I choose not to worry about those things. Neglecting to be thankful and grateful for what I have now is the worst thing I can do to myself and to those closest to me. I now find myself in a place where I want to dig my roots deep and commit. Commit to a serious relationship, career, and find more about myself.

It rains and rains; but it can't rain every day. I have had things fall apart before and know the feeling of a wave crashing into you so hard that it knocks you down to your hands and knees. Yet the tide changes and a steady flow comes around. And this is when your steps grow stronger and you can go deeper into the blue. And the strength and hope comes from knowing that its love between me and you.

 

Someday you're wondering if you're really gonna make it

Sometimes you wanna know if there's anyone to save ya

I know you came down before, like underneath the ground

Still got a little chance to turn it all around

Just know your time will come, so give it all you got

Don't stop believin, so give it all you got

Got, got, got, got...

~Will.i.am

10/26/10

I wrote down a prayer yesterday. It has been a while since I have done so. This is how it goes:

This Is My Prayer: My gracious and loving Father, I ask that you may fill me with your peace, strength, and love to move in your power rather than my own. My circumstance is heavy and only you Father can help me endure and persevere under the weight of this world. Grant me boldness and confidence to know that You are with me and that I am your son. May nothing else, no one else- including my very self- convince me otherwise. Whatever I may be doing, wherever I may be, remind me that you are with me and that you go before me. That you are at each house that I visit, that you are at each presentation, that you are guiding me. I know I can make an impact in the lives of the people that I see and interact with. Make me an encourager amongst the downcast, an uplifter of the fallen, a loving friend to the lonely. May people see my genuine heart and soul as I meet them and share about myself and life. I want my smile and kindness to lighten up the days of everyone else around me. In those times and moments where I find myself losing my patience and my peace, help me Lord to stop, breathe, and align myself under your power and peace that I need to love and succeed. There's so much that I dream to do and accomplish. I'm not weak, a loser, or a failure. I'm not these things because I'm your son and I want to keep you in my heart and in my life. I am strong. I am bold. I am confident. I am unashamed of who I am.The learning and  growing never stops. There will be falls. There will be flops. Yet all I know is that my Father God is with me wherever I may go.

In thy strength, AMEN.   

10/22/10

There's too much to tell. New career, new location, new challenges, etc...
Its like the seasons that flow in and out. There are things that do remain constant though- they matter the most to me.
The time now is a growing time. A growing time for that which is to come. I want to provide for more than just myself.
I want to push and dig deep to reach new ground and strength.
To stay afloat on the water- you just lay there; but to go deep into the below abyss you will encounter what you can't see in yourself and what the weak will always miss.  

The pursuit of happiness is not easy.
Work you ass off.
Do or do not- there is No try.
Just Breathe. Just Believe.

08/15/10

I have no idea of what this post will be about. I'm just going off this feeling of wanting to blog; its therapeutic I suppose... I have to go parable status right now- what happens when a tree branch gets too long and gets in the way of a trail or path that is nearby? when a child gets out of line and throws a loud tantrum that disrespects the authority of the parents, what should be done? when a small barking dog doesn't back down from confronting a larger stronger dog, what'll happen?
the branch will get trimmed down to its appropriate size/length.
the child will be disciplined and made to shut up.
the small dog not knowing when to be quiet and settle down will be enlightened of its role in comparison to the bigger dominate dogs of the pack.

Everything has its place and its role. Everyone who thinks they are something that they are not, will be put in their place- either by the easy way or by the hard way. Simply said- you'll be humbled if you aren't already. Major reminder to be humble rather than to be humbled when you aren't careful with what you say to someone you love. I don't know how to describe it exactly, but I would rather be beaten bloody than to make someone I love deeply cry and feel hurt because of something I said or did to them...
I used to say that I had no regrets.
But I now regret those times where I had done this.
I wish I would've just kept my mouth shut and did nothing at all.
And a lot of the time is stems from thinking you are bigger and better than someone else.
Why do we hurt those that we love the most?

Get low and stay low. That way you can only be lifted up by others.

I thank God for His forgiveness, grace, peace, and love.